KAY'S KORNER

Just got home from my 16 week appointment...oh wait. Oops, I guess I just let that one loose. Okay, let me start over...
It all began one day in November (well really in October, but we will fast forward past that night). Finally I couldn't stand waiting another day. Staring at the two pink lines I felt something completely different than when the plus sign ushered in my first pregnancy.
Sitting at the computer Whitney carried on as any other day. Hands shaking I displayed the stick. "Look. Two lines."
"Hmmm...no, that's not two lines, only one."
"Whatever! See," pointing, "one dark line, and a really faint line. TWO lines."
"Cool." He nods and smiles, turns back to the computer in ignorance of the worrisome lines spreading across my forehead.
"I can't do this Whit. I can't. The loss of sleep. Elijah sleeps through the night now. I can't handle sleepless nights. And two? That means I'll never nap during the day." I mentally remind myself to make a color appointment as I feel gray hairs sprout instantly from my head. Oh wait! Shoot! Coloring hair during pregnancy is forbidden. And so is feta cheese, and brie, and sandwich meat, and fish, and the entire food pyramid! All these restrictions. And what will I look like after baby two?
Though I am back to pre-pregnancy weight, I have given up on pre-baby body. Everyone knows (and compassionately tells you) that with each child you look worse and worse. What encouragement.
Whitney's calm voice brings me back from thoughts of self-pity, "Take another test, in a week or two, just to make sure."
My nostrils flare. "I don't need to. Positive is positive. Besides, you didn't even act excited!" Tears aren't welling in my eyes, but my heart is aching with an abundance of emotions. "Can't you say, 'WAHOO! YEA! This is fantastic' and twirl me around in your arms?"
"WAHOO, YEA. This is fantastic."
He forgot to twirl me in his arms.

With all that said, and the last few months being difficult with all the known beginnings stages of pregnancy, I am finally feeling rather decent. Starting to workout again. And very excited for this little baby. Really, I was only discouraged and terrified for about a week. It is a huge blessing that we are having another little baby and I am thrilled.
Do I prefer boy or girl? I prefer a healthy baby. But name wise...it was difficult enough naming Elijah, so having another boy could be a bit of a challenge, especially since Whitney is still so fond of Winston. And I am not. At all, even in the slightest. Maybe that'll change.
Whitney was ready to have a second child once Elijah's little face graced us, but at that point I was still staring down at a big ol' tire, saddle bags and all that goodness. No matter what, I'm not sure I'll ever be ready when the time comes to have the next baby, but I sure warm-up to the idea when I hear that heart fluttering for the first time.

EDIT: I don't want this post to make Whitney sound like he doesn't care, cause believe me, he does! But you know us women. We have this idea in our head of how things are suppose to go. Whit's amazing and couldn't be more excited for the upcoming addition!